Introduction

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths (Proverbs 3:5-6).

By nature many young people are lighthearted and immature as they approach the courtship stage of life. To them, courtship and marriage look like high adventure. The romance, the newness, and the awakening physical sensibilities easily intoxicate them. If a young person is not careful, his immaturity will lead him into paths which he may regret for a lifetime. History records many marital tragedies resulting from the lack of: self-discipline, parental restraint, and sober thinking. As a young person, you do not need to be added to the record.

As parents, we are responsible before God to prepare our children for courtship and marriage. Our personal experiences and our observations of others need to be included with this study to make it the most practical. Our youth will appreciate the time spend discussing these issues together.

We hope this study will help us to be a bit more thoughtful, more careful, and more informed about the whole process. This booklet cannot make anyone more mature. A person will demonstrate their maturity by what he does with the counsel received. May God grant our youth His sovereign direction, His strength, and his peace as they enter into this most serious, yet enjoyable stage of life.

Table of Contents

Chapter 1: Coming to Maturity

• God's Wonderful Plan
• Seek Ye First the Kingdom of God
• Evaluating Lifetime Goals
• Developing Open Communication
• Signs of Maturity

Chapter 2: Common Sense for Youth

• Personal Snares
• Social Snares
• Financial Snares
• Choosing Godly Friends

Chapter 3: Before You Court

• Is the Practice of Courtship Biblical?
• Talking Things Over With Your Parents
• Looking for Character Qualities
• What If the Feelings Are Not There?
• Is There a One and Only?
• Is Marriage for Me?

Chapter 4: Christian Courtship Practices

• Goals and Ideals for Courtship
• Initiating the Courtship
• Responding to the Request for Friendship
• What Shall We Do and Where Shall We Go?

Chapter 5: Courtship Standards

• Establishing Courtship Standards
• Why Have Standards?
• Why Have Purity in Courtship?
• Planning for a Pure Courtship
• Reaping
• Standing Firm

Chapter 6: Evaluating Your Courtship

• Can a Courtship Become too Important?
• Emotions During Courtship
• Evaluating the Relationship
• Terminating a Courtship
• Blessings of a Spirit-Led Courtship

Chapter 7: The Engagement Initiated

• The Purpose for Engagement
• Thinking About Engagement
• The Engagement
• Responsibilities During Engagement

Chapter 8: Planning for a Christ-Centered Wedding

• Biblical Principles for Weddings
• Practical Plans

Chapter 9: The Wedding Trip

• Time Together
• The Itinerary
• Temptations

Chapter 10: Setting Up Housekeeping

• Him and Her
• Start a Family or Work Away?
• Finances

Chapter 11: Harmonious Married Life

• Maintaining a Family Altar
• The Role of a Christian Husband
• The Role of a Christian Wife
• Planning for a Family
• Keeping Communication Open
• The Couple as Individuals
• Relating to Parents and In-Laws

Chapter 12: Facing the Abnormal Realistically

• Troubled Homes
• Biracial Marriages
• Cross-Cultural Marriages
• Marriages With the Handicapped
• Marriages With the Deprived
• Marriage With a Widow or Widower
• Counsel for a Troubled Marriage

Chapter 13: The Divorce and Remarriage Dilemma

• Marriage From a Biblical Perspective
• The Bible and Divorce
• Returning to the First Partner
• Why Divorce and Remarriage is Sin
• How Should the Church Respond?
• In Summary
• In Conclusion